Do (Did) you have a better relationship with your mother or your father?

Blog Purpose

Raising children is a full-time, life-time endeavor, and just because your children leave the nest, your role and influence continue. However, many challenges (generally uninvited ones) appear from time to time.

This blog is designed to informally explore both the joy and possible adversity that accompanies the raising of a family, and by doing so, provides some possible solutions to improving family relationships. It started with the idea of trying to be more self-reflective on my own experiences as an imperfect parent, but I thought others could benefit and share ideas on the topics as well. Although the focus in on parenting, most of the postings apply just as well to any relationship, including siblings and especially those who are dating. Visitors are invited to share their thoughts and opinions on the topic.

Posts are moderated only to filter spam and unrelated/inappropriate content, but all opinions on the topic of this blog are respected and invited.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Feeding Your Marriage

"Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years."
Attributed to Simone Signoret (French actress, 1921-1985)

Stress can occur in a marriage when kids seem to be spinning out of control or if they are simply going through the everyday, evolving (and perplexing) nature of being a teenager. One day they might seem to be acting completely  rationale, and then they go ballistic the next. Face it. To a large degree, you won't be able to control what they do and say; they only real control you have to any degree is how you respond to it.
Unfortunately, all of this stress can exact its toll on a marriage and the relationship you have with your spouse. For this reason, feeding your marriage with daily acts of kindness and compassion, along with a double serving of love and thoughtfulness, can go a long way to lifting one's spirit and mending wounds. In the many years I jave published online, I have seldom spoken of my wife just because she much prefers to remain out of the limelight; however, I wouldn't do our family justice by not mentioning the glue that binds our family together. In particular, she has done so much to make me happy, and in term, I have worked hard to reciprocate these same acts of kindness.
Generally speaking, young couples with glitz and exhuberant anticipation of marriage in their eyes have little understanding of what life will throw at them 2,5, 10, or 20 years down the road, and in a way, that is a good thing because we might be so afraid of the future that we don't have the faith and hope that things will turn out for our good. Courage often develops before and during the battle.
When daily battles are to be fought, small acts of kindness and love to our spouses are truely the tiny threads, sown together over time, and keep people together. From time to time, a thread might snap, but the combined total of thousands of them sustain marriage and families in the midst of life's challenges. 

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