Do (Did) you have a better relationship with your mother or your father?

Blog Purpose

Raising children is a full-time, life-time endeavor, and just because your children leave the nest, your role and influence continue. However, many challenges (generally uninvited ones) appear from time to time.

This blog is designed to informally explore both the joy and possible adversity that accompanies the raising of a family, and by doing so, provides some possible solutions to improving family relationships. It started with the idea of trying to be more self-reflective on my own experiences as an imperfect parent, but I thought others could benefit and share ideas on the topics as well. Although the focus in on parenting, most of the postings apply just as well to any relationship, including siblings and especially those who are dating. Visitors are invited to share their thoughts and opinions on the topic.

Posts are moderated only to filter spam and unrelated/inappropriate content, but all opinions on the topic of this blog are respected and invited.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Forgiveness: A Building Block of Postive Relationships

An often seen quote whose authorship I am unaware sizes up one key element in good relationships:

"Learn to write your hurts in the sand and to carve your blessings in stone."

It probably wouldn't take any one us but a moment to think of one (or many more times) in which you felt offended by the actions of others. This is very true of marriage and raising children, and too often we tend to hold grudges and treat the postal carrier or the guy handling your order at McDonalds with more courtesy and respect than are own family. 

In life, things happen, and mistakes are made. What we do next will often determine the outcome. Generally speaking, we often take several possible approaches, two of which are (1) holding the offense against someone because they somehow deserve it, and/or (2) we won't let the issue die until the person comes grovelling to us (i.e., we appoint ourselves judge over the situation).
Developing the skill to allow your hurts to be washed away requires very open communication, something with which I still need plenty of practice. However, harboring bitter feelings toward a spouse or children does nothing to foster positive feelings at home.
Posted by Randall Davis at 2:52 PM
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